What is it about a married man that is so irresistible? The unavailable man is very attractive to women who do not want to be controlled by a man. He can provide sporadic attention, sex, usually at regular intervals, definitely advice even when you don't ask for it and gifts. You don't have to live with him,which means no , picking up after him, and usually freedom to come and go as you please. Let's look at a wife. The majority of wives work these days, they also are the primary childcare provider, and most of them do most of the housework and laundry and cooking and shopping as well. They are also expected by their husbands to be sexy and ready for a quickie at the drop of his pants. Women do all this because they put these standards on themselves. They still expect that they have to do more and do it better because they are women. So where does a woman cut back? Usually it is in paying attention to her husband's primary needs. A man needs sex and most married men will tell you that the amount of sex that they get dwindles after marriage and especially after . In addition, the amount of time that a woman has to devote to the nurturing, acceptance, approval and attention to her husband decreases proportionately with the addition of , job responsibilities and a bigger house. So this leads us to the plight of the married man. Who is the married man? First of all he is a man. Men are results oriented. Men have a lot of testosterone. They aren't good at deciphering what women want, especially their own wives.The married man used to run his own life. He came and went as he pleased; he watched or played baseball whenever he wanted. He lived his own lifestyle. He could have his woman withhim whenever hewanted and she would pay all of her attention to him. Now he is married with a couple of , a mortgage, a job he has because it pays the most, not because he loves it so much and a wife who used to cater to him exclusively who now has to divide her time between him, the , the house and usually her job. There was a commercial on TV not too long ago that shows a man thinking about his studly single days and how sexy he was in those days, with a in a stroller. He is playing with his and shopping in the grocery store and a woman is talking to her friend who comments he doesn't even know how much more attractive he is now than he was when he was a stud. Men are pretty about what makes them attractive. According to most women it is not their looks that make them attractive, it is who they are and how they produce in the world. So this married man goes to work and comes home and goes back to work the next day. At work there is this woman. She is single, attractive, smart, capable, speaks his language and someone who has time to pay attention to him. It starts as an innocent flirtation. What goes through his mind is something like "Let's see if I still have it!" so he starts flirting just to see what happens. Not a surprise, she responds to the flirting by flirting back. This is the beginning of the affair. In his mind he is flattered, it is fun, and exciting and just a little bit naughty. What could be more harmless? I'm married.I'm safe. I can just have a little fun with this. So it continues.He thinks he can just experiment a little. Let's see how charming and creative I can be. Let's see if I can get this woman to fall for me. In his mind it is not cheating. He hasn't done anything wrong. In the beginning, he even tells his wife about this woman. He tells her about how smart she is or about some accomplishment, usually what made him notice her in the first place. Wives usually miss the first clues. The thought of the effect of his harmless flirtation on the single woman does not even enter his consciousness. So the harmless flirtation continues. It makes the married man feel good. He is happier at home and everything seems hunky dory. He tells the woman his wife doesn't understand him, she doesn't have time for him, or she just is cruel to him and the o